What would You like people to know about Abuse?

I Can Think Of So Many Things I Doubt If I Could Fit It All In.  The First Is It's Never Your Fault.  Whether Your A Child Or Grown Woman, It's Never Your Fault.  Some People Will Blame You But You Have To Remember It Was A Crime Committed Against You And The Only One To Blame Is The Abuser.  Second You Have To Get Help Somewhere From A Professional Who Knows How To Deal With The Situation.  Sometimes Friends And Family Are Your First Thought For Help But That's Not Always A Good Ideal.  They Aren't Trained To Deal With That Kind Of Situation And Can Unknowningly Say Or Do the Wrong Thing And Make It Worse Until You Get Professional Help And Are In A Better Stronger State Of Mind.  Understand The Traumatic Effects Of Abuse Are Long Lasting And Don't Go Away Overnight, Both The Physical And Emotional Scars Take Time To Heal.  Surround Yourself With Loving Concerned Supportive People And Refuse To Deal Right Away With Anyone Who Doesn't Fall Into That Catagory.  You May Or May Not Want To Deal With Them Later But That Should Always Be Your Choice.  You Have To Take Care Of Yourself First And Foremost. 

firstly never blame yourself no matter how much you feel you maybe you are not.  It is hard to stnad up and admit to being in that situation and you are not a failure for seeking helping or walking away from the abuser.  It takes a lot of strength, courage to do so but perservere and you will get there.  You may think its hard to go it alone, to walk away of course it is but you deserve to be happy in your life and not let others treat your badly.  Be true to yourself and think of yourself, there are so many places out there to help you and i am sure any of your closest friends would help you through also even if to give you a shoulder to cry on, or perhaps even a refuge to think things through for a few days.  You owe it to yourself to stnad up for how you deserve to be treated with upmost respect...so don't live each day in fear and anguish. 

I have been there in the past and it took all my strength to walk away and admit it all, it takes a long time to readjust and for the emotional and physical scars to heal (though they may always be there but the pain will ease in time) but you can and will be happy again.

A= always
B= before
U= u
S= see
E= evil

It is more dangerous than you think.

It is unpredictable

It is NOT YOUR FAULT.

An abuser has a disorder. Abusive personality. 
Abusers are "cured" only 2% of the time.
..and that is ONLY if they continue therapy for the rest of their lives to prevent more.

KIDS by the age of 2 if they did not develop empathy (feeling the feelings of others: like crying if another baby cries) they wont develop it. Lack of empathy leads to Abusive personalities

Psychology says that EMOTIONAL abuse is the most dangerous form. Not physical. This is because it is brainwashing, it is unseen and it can be ignored by the victim who is constantly kept in a state of confusion and slowly led to acceptance. 

Yes I have had friends who were "only" emotionally abused wind up dying at the hands of their husbands.

men are abused by their women too.

Girls should grow UP knowing about abuse in all forms so they can prevent being used by an abuser.

YOU ARE LOVED
YOU ARE WORTH LOVE
YOU ARE WORTH MORE THAN YOU THINK
YOU ARE MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN YOU CAN IMAGINE.

Abusers go for the same types of women
caring
loving
empathetic
smart/intuitive
giving
..should I go on?

So if you were abused, you must be one of those types of beautiful people.

Some celebs who have been abused include
Sharon stone
madonna
.....do they look weak?
NO.. 
VICTIMS OF ABUSE ARE NOT WEAK
MOST TIMES THEY ARE WOMEN WHO THE ABUSER WANTS TO CONQUER SOMEHOW. 

rest in peace loves who didnt make it to this new year... I promise to LIVE IT TO THE BEST I CAN FOR YOU!!!

You are so loved by the survivors that get to know you. Remember that!

We are here for EACHOTHER!

~selina

I know this is going to sound strange but some folks may not be sure if what they are experiencing is domestic violence. There are many ways of finding out if you or your loved ones are caught in a circle of violence. The Power & Control Wheel is a good place to begin.
**********************************************
http://www.edvp.org/GetInformed/PowerAndControl.aspx
**********************************************
The violent partner goes through phases of course, and that is where things can get truly confusing. If they bring flowers or gifts after an occurance of violent behavior, and promise to never do it again, and then there is a quiet phase, and things arent that bad, it does not mean things will not escalate in the future. Check out the wheel i am posting a link to. Look into the site also or one like it in your area, remember to clear the evidence of any searches on a computer used also by the offender...for if they see the searches in cookies or something they can be threated by the fact you may leave them...
Form an escape plan that only you and your closest family member or friend will know about...leaving a bag of personal items at their home in case you need to run for your life. These plans are talked about in sites on domestic violence. Maybe even use a local library to do research on the topic. So no one will discover your inquiry into making your way in the world without being abused by someone claiming they love you.
REMEMBER THAT YOU ARE VALUABLE, WORTHY, AND STRONG ENOUGH TO LEAVE A BAD SITUATION.
Your life may depend on it, statistics on deaths by domestic violence are no joke, it happens every single day. 
Take care and know you are LOVED~ 
No one deserves to be manipulated into submission, hit, tortured, or abused by those who claim to care for them.
~I too have been there, I lived with a violent man for five years.
love Tracey

Even when we are sick, they continue to neglect,belittle and acuse us of being hypocondriacts! Even trying to defy logic and facts. This is the best thing I can say, right now.
 http://bln.gs/b/1qmh48

And a sneak peek at an abuser at rest.
http://bln.gs/b/1jtx39